part 2: a well of hope

Darkness overwhelms my car as I drive the boys to preschool.  The worry is weighing heavy on my shoulders.  I keep trying to shake it off.  I keep trying to look to Him through my fear-filled lens.  But the surgery is just seven days away and the uncertainty of the events is taking over.  This is the heaviest day I have felt in a long time.  Out of desperation, I call my friend and confess the sorry state I am in.  She shares a beautiful analogy I have never heard before…

“You need to build yourself a well of hope.  Take the promises of God and imagine each one a brick.  Build a wall that surrounds you with His bricks of truth shielding you and protecting you from anything that tries to take you down.  And before you know it, all you will see is the hope from His Light shining above.”

Yes.  This is what I need to do.  Nothing is left in my pocket but the idea of this wall and I hurry home with only this one thing on my mind.  Everything around quiets and His promises take center stage. Each time a scripture penetrates my heart, I write it down and start building bricks on my kitchen wall…

Brick #1:  “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”  Jeremiah 29:11

Brick#2: The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.  Exodus 14:14

Brick#3:  Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.  1 Peter 5:6-7

Brick #4:  You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.  Psalm 32:7

Brick #5:  My eyes are ever toward the Lord, for he will pluck my feet out of the net.  Psalm 25:15

Brick #6:  Don’t fret or worry.  Instead of worrying—pray.  Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.  Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down.  Philippians 4:6,7

Each time I write down a promise; I pray through it to God, and place it onto my wall.  I can literally feel the darkness fading and the True Light starting to shine in.  I have such focus on the truth each promise brings that I’m shocked when I start writing the next brick, and out of nowhere, I feel God prompt me with a distinct thought, “you are writing on a neon post-it.”  Friends, I know this is not my thought.  It is totally out of left field and I don’t even know the point of it.  I cry and tears roll because even though I’m not sure what He means, I know the Almighty God of Heaven is reaching down to touch my little broken self.   He goes on to remind me that I have written about neon post-its before.  So I quickly pull out my laptop, and through tears, I scan this writing.   In it, I had written about the first time I distinctly remember testing God.  As a young girl, I wrote Him a letter on a neon pink post-it and sent it off into the wind, asking Him if He was real to send it back beneath my pillow. He didn’t. 

After reading this, I ask Him again, “What are you trying to tell me?” And then, as clear as day, there’s the answer…

“Test me on these neon post-its.  And every single time, I’ll come through for you.” 

Yes! My heart sings.

My heart sings not only because He chose to give me this divine encounter, but because when I can’t count on anything else—I can always count on Him. 

Yes—the well of hope.   I’m in it now--His light shining down and His promises hemming me in; protecting me from what surrounds.  And Psalm 27:1-3 comes to mind: 

The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear?  The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid?  When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who stumble and fall.  Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident.